Never Knows…

"No matter how the world has changed, it will still be the place we have to rely on everyday!"

This world just full of doubts, sometimes you will be a little bit self-centered that you actually knowing everything; but sometimes you might sudden realize that you're actually a jerk who don't know anything, yet pretending to be the one.

Maybe I must say this is human beings….we are just too well appreciate to have a great mind, great thought! In fact, we're just thinking of nonsense and sometimes only imaginary and virtual thingy which would never ever happen.

Something happen on me recently….I used to feel that I am the one to him, I can actually bring the imaginary and virtual into my real life. However, seems like I'm just thinking a little bit too much. There's hardly to be fairy tales happen in real life, even though sometimes u might dream of you to be the princess in the castle, the prince who is the mighty warrior. I'm not saying it's 100% impossible, but at least its 0.00000000000000001 possibility. I must admit that I really got feeling on him, but GOD knows, it might just works in virtual world. In reality, the feeling might just fade away so, or maybe disappointment! What a complicated world is this!!!

Maybe I should have set up a camera in front of me last time, capture every single moment I'm with him….hahahaha….cause don't know why, he's the one who can make me smile and laugh in front of a dead screen. If my mom was passing my room that time, sure she will get me to the temple, expel and invoke the spirit! Hahaha! But, sometimes I keep on thinking; does he feel the same as I am? Or he's just entertaining a forsaken? Again! GOD knows. Of cause, I hope that he's same as me, laugh and smile stupidly in front of the screen. Then at least I don't feel like I'm the forsaken gal…

He's really a special guy in my life. I guess till the day I die, he will be the one running 360® in my mind. He just…gives me…really…some kind of special feeling, at least in my special 21th years living in this world! Somehow, I actually believe that no one can actually do like what we have did. Cause it's actually kind of hard to have such special connection, I mean with the world full of attraction and bias, wanna keep stay on one person, it's not that easy. When I'm with him, I really hope that the time won't pass that fast, cause I really not willing to leave the keyboard when talking to him. But, no choice, we have to, time just not for two of us, it's running for everyone! The only way you can do just appreciate each and every single moments, then you will really have a sweet dream when you're sleeping. It's just blissful!

To be continue…..

Fuckerama...

I've been hurt badly by a stupid idiot Geek today.....I really can't imagine i can actually be friend with such fucker for such a long time......i feel that i myself is stupid stupid stupid!!!!!

You dunno me and i dunno you this idiot asshole, we're just fucking crazy rubbish bout everything.....and now i really don't have any single fuckin idea how i actually did that!!!!

SO, from now on.....i'll juz kick ur mother asshole out of any equation of my life.....u IDIOT fuckerama!!!!

HATE u! FUCK u!!!!

back to ur idiot geek world~~~~

~~~OLYMPIC vs BRANDED~~~

Strength & Beauty

Every 4 years, the whole world will have a big gathering to unite and in successing the only and very own Olympic games.....and this year, we are so proud to have it in Asia - the Beijing 2008!

There were philosophers who described Olympic as the essence of Strength & Beauty, and Beauty will always related to Fashion......this indirectly bring to a lot of businesses to those brands! So before the end of Beijing Olympic 2008, let's take a look at those competitions and matches not inside the Olympic field, but the outside Fashion field!!!

1997, Prada success to bring in Sport element into luxurious brand and create a Prada Sport phenomenon with its "RED line" sporty fashion. Especially the sport shoe which achieved enourmous success ever in the history with an incredible sales of 16 millions pairs.....

As one of the successor in sport fashion, Prada works hard to be the No.1 brand in Beijing 2008! This summer, the goods come out with a cute bear as the main element.

Classic & Legendary - TONER 化妆水

Clinique Clarifying Lotion 2號潔膚水

誕生年：1968
推薦原因：

該品牌最為經典且最為暢銷的產品，第一個以去角質概念出發的化妝水，標榜適合一般肌膚適用，但其實更推薦中油性膚質使用。成分其實非常簡單：水、酒精、金縷梅、薄荷腦，雖然有人一直質疑其中酒精與薄荷腦的刺激性，然而，這支產品由於是以擦拭的方式來達到再次清潔肌膚的效果，當中酒精與薄荷的短暫接觸肌膚我認為其實並不會造成肌膚的負面影響。至少，在銷售將近40年中，如果因此造成肌膚的傷害，相信該產品早已不存在，使用時有明顯清涼感受，正確使用真的可以將表皮一些老廢角質去除，以幫助後續保養品吸收，並防止毛孔阻塞。

Kosé Medicated Sekkisei Lotion雪肌精

誕生年：1985

推薦原因：

日本20年來創下3000萬瓶驚人銷售奇蹟的產品，可說是Kosé這個品牌的鎮牌之寶，相信許多人都使用過，即使添加酒精成分，仍然受到市場空前歡迎，添加了相當比例的漢方中藥萃取如旋覆花．薏仁．牡丹皮．白蘞．當歸等植物萃取，具有相當不錯的清涼及鎮靜效果，另外小麥胚芽油以及維他命E酯也賦予產品乳白色的質地與清爽的滋潤保濕效果。

SKⅡ Facial Treatment Essence青春露

誕生年：1980

推薦原因：

『如果妳沒有用過青春露、就等於沒有用過SKⅡ！』，這句耳熟能詳的廣告詞其實也所言不假，SKⅡ的第一支產品，同等於Pitera的保養價值，如果妳願意相信Pitera，那麼這瓶高達92.7%比例Pitera的青春露的確值得你一試，有微微酸臭的氣味，不含香料色素，用後肌膚有保濕的感受。推薦原因就在於Pitera的多重保養價值，各種肌膚都適合使用。

小城大事

I have no idea what happen on me this few days.....just feel that my mouth getting heavier and heavier!!! I have to strain my mandible, show that i'm ok.....haizzz:(

That day I went out with him for dinner.....the whole night, we juz keep silent and eat our meals! All that could be heard merely the stiring voices of teaspoon and the music blewing in the bistro~~~ He knew i'm not in mood, once he opens his mouth, for sure i will just create fight with him.....but, it just displeased me more when he does so!!! Why can't he makes me happy???

We sat there for 2 hrs +, and he's just busying with his DOPOD.....and I'm juz taking photos there and prong the cake....at the end, we don't even have a single conversation....which I actually hoped for~~~

Maybe you might suspect that i'm having red-craze-aunties visit....but it's not! On the way driving me home, I just keep wondering.....do I still in love with him??? does he thinking what I am thinking as well??? I'm just so so so confused!!!! I didn't even say goodbye to him that night....juz stepped out of the car after he untied my safety belt! I really don't know what am I doing. I really do pay all my intention and effort for the outing, I makeup myself, dress-up myself....all just for him!!! But, I just able to show a crumby sad face which myself fell annoying to it.....

Even in msn, I've lost my patient while chatting....I just wish to dominant the person I'm chatting with, I don't want them to chat with someone else.....I wanna be the only one, the one they really pay attention to~~~

Hopefully everything will back to normal soon!!!

This is the song I keep listening to this few days........小城大事 by Miriam Yeung!!! It's an old song, but really pierce my heart~~~~吻下来~~~豁出去~~~

不洗臉也會漂亮！?

現代人生活忙碌，不論做什麼事都是分秒必爭，什麼都是講求快速有效果，吃飯講速度，交通講速度，現在的日本美眉連卸妝洗臉也講求有效的快速呢！

最近的日本美眉流行一種”法國式洗顏法”，據說法國人是不太用水來洗臉或洗頭髮的！因為法國的水質是屬於礦物質濃度較高的硬水，所以如果常用硬水來清洗肌膚，就很容易產生粗躁感，所以法國人寧願大噴香水也不太常洗澡。雖然日本的水質沒有法國的糟糕，但是相對的，東方人的肌膚也較細緻，容易因為外界的種種因素而有過敏的產生。而所謂的”法國式洗顏法”就是指不用水洗的方式，以不含色素、礦物油的乳液狀清潔用品去除髒污，然後再以化妝水擦拭而達到清洗的效果！這樣不只能防止角質層裡較滋潤的成分流出，也能提高肌膚的自我保護功能，而不致受到太多化學物質的影響。

現在市面上所謂的法國式洗顏法的產品在日本有很多，除了洗顏之外，有些商品也添加了卸妝的功能。ロゼット　クレンジングミルク內含的橄欖油和スクワランオイル都是由天然植物萃取而來，具有天然的保溼效果，也能有效去除髒污。而薰衣草精油的芳香成分能紓緩肌膚，使肌膚達到放鬆。至於珍貴的蜂王漿萃取物可以達到縮小毛孔的效果，而高麗人參萃取物更能幫助肌膚保持滋潤維持肌膚的張力。眾多珍貴成分的ロゼット　クレンジングミルク，來看看他的去污效果吧！

Hurt~~~

hmm.....sometimes we should have protect ourself perhaps with a shield or just keep a particular distance with any friends you know.....

Can you imagine when someone who forgot your birthday and said "we're just friend, you expect too much~~~"!

Ouch!~~

It's so so so hurt~~~but nevermind.....at least I've get the lesson....people tend to change when you get to know them for a time, or maybe they are just pretending themselve while knowing!!!

It's ok~~~i got to find something else to cheer up my day!!!~~~

A za A za Fighting!!~~~

~夢幻高跟鞋大PK~

女人和高跟鞋，「2吋、3吋、4吋，高，還要更高，高跟鞋永遠不嫌高，因為那是女人最接接近天堂的機會! 」

人類穿鞋的紀錄久遠，但是如何在舒適之餘，穿出性感的學問卻沒完沒了。崛起於五Ｏ年代純手工、且鞋楦製作超過半個世紀經驗的義大利Sergio Rossi，1999年加盟Gucci家族，打著「奢華」的頂級招牌走自己的路。泰瑪拉．梅隆 (Tamara Mellon)1996年和在倫敦東區訂製女鞋聞名的周仰傑 (Jimmy Choo)一拍即合推出Jimmy Choo女鞋，從此，女人又多了一個展現性感的把戲，穿鞋吧!

慾望城市 (Sex and The City)女主角莎拉潔西卡派克愛鞋成痴，她對Manolo Blahnik女鞋的愛超過情人。日本流行天后濱崎步狂買紅色鞋底的Christian Louboutin高跟鞋更不是新聞。碧昂絲甚至把她對高跟鞋的情感寫進流行歌詞裡。Sergio Rossi、Jimmy Choo和ManoloBlahnik都是挑逗視覺聞名並列全球三大性感高跟鞋，擄獲所有女人的芳心。

最早和Gianni Versace合作，迅速在米蘭時尚界打開知名度的Sergio Rossi；80年代為Dolce&Gabbana和Azzedine Alaia等一線品牌生產鞋履而成名。特殊的造型和精緻的手工技藝之外，豔名遠播的性感高跟鞋之所以成為名媛夢幻逸品，最重要的是要懂得跟上好萊塢女星的踩紅毯的腳步，成為「星光大道」的代名詞。荷莉、貝瑞、希拉蕊、史旺、莎莉賽隆等奧斯卡影后，流行歌手碧昂絲、凱莉米勒和瑪丹娜也都是名牌高跟鞋追星的最佳代言。

去年被國際知名證券公司-陶爾布魯克資本 (TowerBrook CapitalPartners)收購而躍上頭條的Jimmy Choo，市場價值超過一億八千五百萬英鎊。Jimmy Choo初期以製作高雅的繫帶晚宴女鞋為經典，高跟鞋、靴子、以及超過100公分的精緻手工女鞋都是超人氣的招牌款。但最值得一試的是Jimmy Chooj所謂「The Vintage Collection」系列，每款鞋墊特別印製金色星形標記。

不受任何年代和創意的設限的「經典」高跟鞋，最常綴以施華洛世奇(Swarovski)水晶展現晚宴效果、因為電視劇慾望城市 (Sex andthe City)而聲名大噪的紫色絨布面羽毛繫帶女鞋、或是獨特稀有的豹紋和性感穿透的蕾絲裝飾總是和性感自主的女人聯想在一起。很多人不了解高跟鞋的性感配方是什麼? 「試想養尊處優的腳Ｙ子，露出塗上蔻丹的纖纖玉足多性感，」設計師的答案是，就像穿著一樣，露愈多，愈性感。但最教人好奇的是，踩進一雙叫價120萬元野生鱷魚皮的高跟鞋的滋味如何?

Memory....

I'll remember you forever......the every single moments we have gone through so far!!!!

The scar of this words will ever stay at Fremantle Beach.....the beach belongs to you and me!!!

If you could choose to go anywhere,

just close your eyes and imagine.

The world belongs to just you and i if

I could be there with you.

If any road was one we could take

and any place could be ours.

You make the choice to leave me today

never ever I could be there with you.

If I am where you are

nowhere is too far

so hope you will take me with you

because all i need is you...

When you're gone~~~

hehe^^ never know that the time goes by so fast, it's been almost 1 month I never update my blog....But, nevermind la, nobody really visits too.....

It's been so busy for me nowadays, keep study, study and study! haizzz.... really hope that I can be a princess, no need to study anymore!!!! haha...

Haizz...dunno why....i'm really moody today!!! I start to think am I fall on him already??? I really have no idea.....I just feel so sad when his attitude and response to me turn from a volcano into iceberg, right after knowing I have someone!!! My life suddenly like lack of something, just feel like someone very important in life has gone~~~Now, the song that really can express my feeling will be this song:-

"When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
And when you're gone
The words I need to hear
To always get me through the day
and make it okay
I miss you"

I think he won't chat with me anymore...he told me that he had give up!!! From the response he gave to me, I know that ending is rushing to me..... Anyway, I'll wish him all the best as he always dreamt of being a businessman~~~He definitely can!!!

I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
"Missed you but I try not to cry"
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'll give the world to see your face
And I'm bragging right next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say
Bye Bye~~

:(

New love~~~

Hehe….just went for shopping few days ago, erm…more accurately skincare shopping!!!!

But this few days really broke already; many things just can see, touch, try….but cant own it….haizzzz….

Going to show daddy my pity slim purse d T.T

Whole day shopping merely get a moisturizer and a mask…aiks…what a shame!!!! But still, so satisfy with the products I’ve bought. Damn NICE~~~~is it a bit braggart???hehe:)

Here it is my latest moisturizer Loreal Paris White Perfect Gentle Moisturizing Day Cream SPF20 PA+++! Actually I feel like I’ve been grudged by Loreal’s products….no matter how disappointed I am to the last few products, I’ll still give it a second chance when new products released…haizzz…how come ya???

I’ve been using each version of White Perfect day cream from 2005 to 2008, the classic till the relighting whitening and finally the gentle series….honestly each of them doesn’t really satisfied me, but still I always have the intensity on trying their products! Now I know how important is the commercial…hehe:) The classic tend to be really oily and hard to smooth it all over the skin, not only the whitening effect not seen at all, it causes breakout!!! Faintzzzz

Come to the relighting whitening series, I must say that there are improvements….the cream become less oily and more easier to smooth over the skin. From the aspect of ingredient, more hydrating agents were added and whitening power really improved a lot!!! Still pimples popping out each time!!!Faint..

Now come to the new latest Gentle series, which claimed to be suitable for sensitive skin as well. I must say that the texture really nice, it becomes more silky and super easy to spread over the face though it’s a cream….love it! I can’t say it’s non-greasy at all, but compare to the last version, it’s really far lighter! If you’re just stay indoors, this is definitely a nice and suitable moisturizer for you! Really unbelievable with the texture, heavy in look yet light in applying….most important is that the adding of Light Reflecting Micro Pearls that can create the immediate flash white effect, don’t even need a shimmering cream to create 3D effect, this moisturizer will do!!!

OK! Now take a look at the ingredients. Undeniable, Loreal Paris trademark Melano-block™ or scientific name Calcium D-Pantetheine-S-Sulfonate(complicated huh) is actually a type of Vitamin B5 derivatives, it claimed to have the ability to block the oxidation of tyrosine and so decrease the formation of melanin; while Vitamin C(Ascorbyl Glucoside)have the effect of preventing skin darkening and melanin precipitation. Besides that, this day cream which have SPF20 PA+++ UV defense, effective by the 2 star ingredients – Mexoryl SX and Mexoryl XL, that forming a protection ring. Parsol-1789 and Titanium Dioxide also added in this products…thus, for safety purpose, it’s better to test it before buy especially sensitive skin though it claimed to be fragrance free and thus suit all skin type. I’ve found an ingredient which is never added in Loreal products – Shea Butter! Perhaps the better hydrating effect of this day cream cause of it.

So, with the smell of natural plants, I recommend this to normal/dry skin! Cause it’s really worth, with the immediate flash white effect!!! Cheers~~~

**Whitening Trend in 2008**

It’s the peak season of Whitening products again….it has become the norm since whitening products gain its fabulous market and welcome from the Asians, who dream of getting fairest skin in the world perhaps.

Though we always saying that this new formula formed; that formula improved, but still the classic Vitamin C(L-ascorbic acid) partnered with various manifold of plants extract the sovereign in 2008. Is this in the other way telling us there are no more breakthroughs in whitening skincare???

World’s largest cosmetics company – L’Oreal’s line brands, Biotherm and Lancome for instance, recently added the latest approved whitening ingredient by WHO, Ellagic Acid.

Estee Lauder’s turmeric extract, using “curcumin” to block the release of histamine, thus block the inner skin from forming brown spots, “N-Acetyl Glucosamine” to mildly remove the keratin cells layer, “Yeast extract” darkening recovery technology and last but not least Estee Lauder own unique therapy, whitening by mental relaxing, using aromatherapy.

Shu Uemura, who’s under L’Oreal group as well, uses “Ougon extract” and “Gentian extract” essence. Gentian extract to block tyrosine, Ougon to prevent the melanin from reaching the epidermis layer, blend with the lipoprotein molecule. This three whitening gates block the production of melanin and the pathway of melanin transportation, give you a clear and glowing skin without spots!!!

Not much difference from the former whitening trend, SK-II merely improve its fundamental principles by combining the new lustrous whitening ingredients, YAP and OAT to enhance skin moisture and the trademark ingredient – DMT-Blocker which consist of Vitamin C, Vitamin B3 and Pitera, vertically (lyses the keratin cell) penetrate deep into dermis layer, block the formation of melanin and guide out the melanin ; horizontally(peel off the keratin cell) effective skin peeling effect, remove the gloomy dead cell layer.

Lancome new Blanc Expect NeuroWhite X³ Petal, specially designed for accurate diminish action on the spot. The unique essence which contain NeuroWhite™ System and Ellagic Acid, able to block the formation of melanin by 70%, salicylic acid enhance the effect by languished the melanin in keratin layer, the natural French Provence rose extract in fact calm and soothe the skin.

To be continue>>>>>>>　　

Just be yourself!!!!!

haizzz...sometimes I really have no idea what am I doing!

Everyday doing the same stuff, doing the things which I shouldn't have done....I really feel so sorry......Starting good, doesn't mean that it will last forever! Perhaps that's what people always said "the world isn't exist just for you!". I understand, I do.....but no point, I still forget the message hidden!

I have friends, but why am I wanna be like isolate myself from them....always suspect, criticize and scold them. I don't know.....maybe it sounds so irresponsible saying so, I know! But really, I feel that from the first day itself, God been unfair to me....why they refuse to give me an ideal life??? I willing to have shorter life....really.....as long as i get what I wish for! But, I know that's impossible....no one can deal with God! or maybe that's the challenge I have to face in my life!!!

Looking forward???haha....I really can't see anything! Just a blur, greyish and painful striking light flickering in front of me. Sometimes I rather when I open my eyes, I won't get to see anything else, a dark, quiet, peaceful view....which I don't have to worry about anything, just to be the real self!!! Will this become reality? I don't think so! I really thought that I am the one in this earth being conscious about everything, others are just my imagination , they don't really exist, just to play a role in my life! But, as now I've grown up, I know that all that is childish and rubbish....this world is serving everyone, and I'm just the very very very small or even an unable to distinguish object! We can cry, we can laugh, but what for? We'll just forget the feeling at that moment in a short while....emotions just fake and being....It wont be constant in our life, merely a flux!

Maybe people won't understand me, feel that i'm sassy and just unreasonable!!! But, who really knows who am I??? I am...who I am, I just have no choice but to do so.....am I wrong? Just blame why am I so, who create me to be so? the person should be blamed! I'm just forced to be so!!! I don't really happy with current, why? why? why? I just wanna have a normal life! Is that considered as over, or it's the KARMA from my former life.....please.....I really can't bear anymore such stressful life....I am human, just a very very ordinary person in this world, why am I have to do something bad just to satisfy myself and fulfill my loneliness!!! I hate it!!!
That's all fake, that's not real~~~~~~~

I really hope that I can put everything down, and be the real me, the real person I've been destined to be.....I've lost myself!!!!!!

The End.....haizzz.....

Just now, something happened!!!

END 06/05/08!!!!!!!

anxious.....

I didn't sleep well last night.....today, when I woke up, I feel so nervous, anxious, uneasy, worry, etc..... an infinity list!!!

I just feel scare, hopefully nothing bad will happen and my dreams will come true!!!!

Thanks anyway to the guy who chat with me till 3am last night(this morning actually), I didn't tell you about my anxiousness, but you did accompany me to pass through the night!!! Though after that my bro off the router, I can't say bye to you, sorry!
You know who you are right???

God bless^^

**World's best sunblock**

This is my favourite sunblock ever after i tried more than dozen of sunblocks....perhaps the words MADE IN JAPAN really convincing....hehe^^

It is a sunblock which is non greasy at all and most important it able to moisturize your face!

Biore claimed to have SPF50+ PA+++, meaning that it is one of the highest sun protection value in the market after Sunplay SPF130.....but actually, you can notice there are a "+" after SPF50 in Biore, this is because Japan Health Ministry had made a law stated that no sunblock can label more than SPF50, any sunblock higher than that, can add a sign"+"....thus, Biore might be higher than Sunplay, we won't know!!! For your information, Sunplay is a products under Mentholatum, Korea product.

Since nothing to do today, let me tell about some scientific knowledge....hehe....if you feel bored, can just skip this!!! Everyday, we just keep talking about UV, UV and UV, but do you know exactly what UV did to our body???

UV is a type of radiation which capable to cause cancer. The effects on cell include inhibition of cell division, inactivation of enzymes, induction of mutations and in sufficient dosage, death of cells. There are mainly 3 types of UV rays - UVA, UVB & UVC. Among them, UVB is the most dangerous, as it is carcinogenic. In the other word, it responsibles for most of the skin carcinoma for instance basal cell carcinoma, squamous cell carcinoma, and melanoma! How it affects the cell? It is attributed to its formation of pyrimidine dimers in DNA and sometimes it will cause mutations in p53 and RAS oncogene....UVA won't cause severe harmful effects while UVC though is mutagenic but fortunately it is filtered by ozone layer....however, in case the ozone layer deplete, then "cham" lol!!! Perhaps it quite complicated for understanding, to explain in the simple way, 95% of them are UVA, it radiates in a high proportion whole day long, causes melanin accumulation, thus form dark spot and aging ; UVB in fact causes redness and swelling, and most of the symptoms shown after went to beach, they will radiate in large amount from 10am to 3pm.

So, whenever you go and buy sunblock, you can see the label SPF and PA. SPF means sun protection factor, protect you from UVB. PA means protection factors of UVA, this measurement is officially released by Japan cosmetic company. As you can notice, most of the Japan brand will labeled both SPF and PA, while Europe products will merely have SPF and some will put PPD. Don't worry, SPF normally will range from 15 to 50....it means how long you can stand to the sun, before you get sunburn. You can calculate it by simply adding a zero and convert it into minutes. For example, if you're using SPF 15, meaning that you can stand under the sun for 150minutes. PA will be valued by the amount of +, as by now, the max is +++.
This is the indicator:-PPD 2~4 is PA+
PPD 4~8 is PA++
PPD 8 above is PA+++
So, whenever you wanna buy sunblock, SPF50 PA+++ will be the best right now!

Back to Biore, this waterproof sunblock can instantly radiance your skin and cover up minor pores! Almost the same texture with Mentholatum Sunplay Range, what we called "Liquid Paper", Biore consists of powder which can absorb oil and cause the skin looks smooth, just like the effect of foundation, but it don't looks like makeup! This product also easy to spread out through the face and won't feel sticky even apply twice on your face! This sunblock need makeup remover to remove in order to get rid from blackhead and whitehead thingy! If possible, I'll recommend a nice makeup remover tomorrow.

Last but not least, give all of you some tips while buying sunblock, just shake the sunblock, and if there are "guli" inside, just like liquid paper! Then, that's a good sunblock!!!!

Whitist forever!!!!

Blessing Day!!!!

Today, I keep repeating one song, till now i'm still repeating....hehe^^

What's the song??? It's Mariah Carey latest singles - Bye Bye, from the new album E=mc². Just feel so blessed while listen to this song, and calm down my heart totally, clear from all the agony!

The lyrics really meaningful, just take a look or you can lipsynched together...hehe

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers
Lift your head to the sky 'cause
we will never say bye

As a child there were them times
I didn't get it but you kept me alive
I didn't know why you didn't show up sometimes
It's something more than saying "I miss you"
But when we talked too
All them grown full things
Separation brings
You never let me know it
You never let it show because
You loved me and obviously
There's so much more left to say
If you were with me today face to face

[ Chorus ]
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
"I wish I could find a way try not to cry"
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'll give the whole world to see your face
And I'm bragging right next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye

(Bye Bye [ 3x ] ) Bye bye

And you never got the chance to
see how good I've done
And you never got to see me back at number one
I wish that you were here to celebrate together
I wish that we could spend the holidays together

I remember when you used to tuck me in at night
With the Teddy Bear you gave to
me that I held so tight
I thought you were so strong
That you can make it through whatever
It's so hard to accept the fact you're gone forever

[ Chorus ]
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
"I wish I could find a way try not to cry"
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'll give the world to see your face
And I'm bragging right next to you (?)
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye

(bye bye bye bye bye bye [ 3x ] ) Bye bye

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandfather
Lift your head to the sky 'cause
we will never say bye

[ Chorus ]
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
"I wish I could find a way try not to cry"
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'll give the world to see your face
And I'm bragging right next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye

BYE BYE!!!!

Shopping = Happy???

Just came back from shopping....really tiring!!!

I wonder why??? Sometimes people tend to misunderstand that shopping is a happy and joyful activity.....for me, yeah!!! sometimes it is. But most of the time, it gave me a depressed feeling...really....

Many people don't understand me, they always thought I'm that kind of girl who just care about materialistic and all those branded stuffs! Yeah, I agree I like to wear branded, but that doesn't mean I materialistic....just imagine, what for we wanna buy those cheaplak material and wear it on? If no budget, just save your money till u afford to buy, isn't that better than buy bunches of clothes back home, and when wanna find clothes for some important date, then only realise all just like "shit"....branded not merely a name, it's a tool for us, help to enhance our outlook and inner confidence!!!

Today, I don't really happy! I bought a lot of stuffs, but just to satisfy and try to make myself out of the moody clouds....but it doesn't work....I just getting more and more desperate and frustrated and I finally end up with "throwing the money into the deep sea"! Perhaps alone shopping is not a good idea, calling friend together? yet I think it might be end up with arguement or cold war with friends....this is what I used to experience:(

Always people will said friend is important, they will help you! But, in this individualistic epoch, the spirit of being friend still there??? How come I never experienced that??? For me, they just make use of me, just because I'm from a OK family, wanna get some advantages.....I understand there are bundle of OK family around, but I can't really believe in them are real to me! Perhaps I'm too sensitive.... Sometimes i'm thinking, if I'm not from a OK family, will they be friend with me??? or will they just keep themselve away from me. I dunno.

Today, I saw a lot of couples, a lot of "machi" shopping together! I just feel awful....coz I'm just holding my tote bag, regard it as my best friend...sad huh? However, today I met one of my junior, whom I used to taught him last time....He seems like looking at me, but I not dare to look at him, just keep myself looking at the different direction; He as well just neglect me from his sight....actually I hope that he will walk to me and say hello, but he didn't....haizzz....guess what? I just comfort myself I've became pretty, that's why he not dare to come to me and greet me or he just can't recognize me...hohoho!!!! Positive thinker^^

Anyway, today's a holiday, I mean yesterday as it already passed May 1, I should keep all my sad feeling aside, let the sun shining on my face. Of cause I wont forget about my sunblock...hehe! Oh ya, guess tomorrow I can introduce about my favourite sunblock!!!

Stay tuned...pika pika!!!! oops, sounds like idiot!

da~da~da~

The first time I listened to this song should be last May I guess...

This is one of the song in Witch YooHee soundtrack, which is my favourite Korean drama all the time....and I did cried a few times while watching this drama, maybe because I watched it alone!

Everytime I listen to this song, it'll just give me some very weird feeling, don't get bias of the word "weird", just I don't know how to describe the feeling! my heart will like beating faster everytime I listen to this song and i'll actually feel a bit nervous yet i'll feel blessed. Very weird is it??? I myself don't know why is it so?

Though I can't understand the meaning of this song, but in my mind there's always some scenes passing by.....It just like a girl who just broke up with her lover, sitting at a lounge, listen to the song. It reminds her about the memorable moments between he and she, both happy and sad moments....every single romantic stuffs the guy had did, already deeply pierced into her heart, no other things can actually substitute that by the moment! And looking at the peoples' around, they are all happy in the pool of love...So, she just decide to put all the sadness behind, appreciate whatever stuff she have right now. That's the most important!

I'm 20 now. Sometimes I really don't know how many days I still can live in this world, will it be the end for me tomorrow??? we won't know! I really hope that in my life, I won't lost anything, I mean I can have my parents accompany me till the day I die, I really hope so!!! I can't imagine my days without them, I really can't afford to stay alive if they're not with me....

So, this is the song which I'll always play whenever i'm sad and need someone to talk with me, let me share my story to....Really envy of them whose have parents to talk with, I mean I just can't express my inner heart's words to my parents! Just can listen to songs, close my eyes, and talking to myself....I believe only "them" can keep my secret and guide me what to do!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RXU9VrIFfM&feature=related

"Sorry" - a powerful word!!!

First day blogging, really have no idea what to write!

So I guess i'll write about an incident happaned few weeks back...an incident which really affect my mood and that's the first time my heart beat till I can't breath...really...

I should start with facebook i guess in telling this story.

Last time, I don't really like to play Facebook cause it's really tough to handle as so many applications really make it looks so complicated....yet, I'm still the one used to scold my friend for recommend me such "idiot" stuff!

Wondering why, I just start addicted to it during my exam days! Which I could said I'll log in every half an hour, to earn some money instead....hehe!

The application I like the most will be the FFS(Friends for sale) and HFS(Hotties for sale). As I don't know why from the first day I start to play FFS, my value already reached $50k....perhaps I'm too cute...hehe....faint....But, anyway this is also the application which lead me to the incident!

My friend, Ezra whose recommend me to play facebook, as he's at US now, for sure this is the hottest webster for them....and he asked me to sign up in order to see his photos. So, I was like OK, just create an account and visit his photo albums when i'm free....*He's a cute guy!!!

Then, when I start addicted to Facebook, for sure the first friend I would like to buy will be him! But, he is $200k in price, so I just keep earning money by buying and selling my friends as my owner really help me a lot....hehe....Then, I ask Ezra to buy me as well and so my price just raise till $500k within few days....cool huh?? Finally I got $300k in hand, and so yeah I owned Ezra!!!

There's a funny feature in FFS that we can actually give them nickname, any name which you prefer....So, I just put some funny name to him like Fatzra, Mashimaro, etc. and he kept complaint about that, but I don't care and he enjoyed that as well....Until one day, one of my MSN friend-ern put a shoutout said "Life is like masturbating, you can only do it with your own hand!" However, I think that's meaningful right...hehe....Thus, I just put that as nickname for Ezra! But, seems like this is an over act for them, I never thought that he is really sensitive to such word....He scold me and asked me to change....

I'm a girl imagine, for sure I won't follow what he asked me to do, and I just argue with him...guess what? His stupid friends still leave comment on his profile and said that I'm cheap! I was like OMG, what the heck this related to her? I immediately told Ezra about this and asked him to ask her to shut up her mouth...but Ezra didn't help me, instead he support her! And he actually ask his friend not to buy him away, so that my $300k stuck with him! I just really angry that time and have a big crash with him....Then, finally he asked his friend to buy him away, and I just type to him "from now on, you are you; me is me".....

Perhaps this sentence too harsh, and we end up with a cold war for 2 weeks....we never talk to each other! But, actually I did a silly attempt during this time...I pretend like I sending a wrong message to him, said"Don't forget to buy me Apple pie tomorrow ya!!!", as he's in US now, impossible for him to buy me apple pie right! I thought he'll reply me like are you sending it to a wrong person or what, but he never reply! I wait for half an hour man! That time I really felt like our friendship just end due to a stupid FFS....Right after 2 weeks, I just pick up my gut and say "hey" to him! He didn't reply me immediately, I was like so nervous that time, croosing finger hope that he'll reply me....When I was going to offline, he replied me! I was like so happy, YEEPEE! Then I try to act a bit arrogant "anything to say", this time i waited for 10 minutes....no reply??? With a little bit of fire, I said"When you're heart got nothing to say, no mean for it forcing u to talk about anything.."

And I never thought that he still mind of the nickname thingy, "u still feel u not wrong saying all those things, nvm lar, forget it, we also become like this d, u can block me in msn if u want"!

I just stunned there, omg is it really that severe??? I didn't reply him...till the next day morning, I type a "touched" message and sent to his Friendster! I never said any word "sorry" inside, instead I used some turning technique to express it....and guess what, it's work!!!hohohohoho!!!

He nudge me in msn and said "sorry" to me....I was like omg, I'm genius, just a simple message then everything FINE!!! thereafter, I also say sorry to him and he said me "da nu ren", but nevermind la.....At least I know that a word "sorry" can really save a lot of problems!!!

So, I think everyone should learn how to say this word whenever needed, really POWERFUL...hehe....